The 90/10 Principle
Author : Stephen Covey ( Management Guru)
Have you read this before?
Discover the 90/10 Principle. It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations). What is this principle?
10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean?
We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different.
You determine the other 90%. How?
By your reaction. You cannot control a red light., but you can control your reaction. Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react.
Let's use an example.
You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just what happened. What happens when the next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse.
You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.
Why?
Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?
The answer is " D".
You had no control over what happened with the coffee.
How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.
Here is what could have and should have happened.
Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, "It's ok honey, you just need, to be more careful next time".
Grabbing a
towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.
Notice the difference?
Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different.
Why?Because of how you REACTED.
You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.
Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle.
If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.
How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic?
Do you lose your temper?
Pound on the steering wheel? A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off)
Do you curse?
Does your blood pressure skyrocket?
Do you try and bump them?
WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive?
Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it.
You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job.
The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day.
Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse.
Now you know the 90-10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will lose nothing if you try it.
The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle. The result? Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache. There never seem to be a success in life.
Bad days follow bad days.
Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. There is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships. Worry consumes time.
Anger breaks friendships and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel.
Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged..
You can be different!
Understand and apply the 90/10 principle.
It CAN change your life.........!!!!!!!
Friday, August 05, 2005
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Signed with love from: God & Jesus & Me.
Sally jumped up as soon as she saw the Surgeon come out of the operating room. She said: "How is my little boy? Is he going to be O.K.? When can I see him?"
The Surgeon said, "I'm sorry, we did all we could."
Sally said, "Why do little children get cancer, doesn't GOD care anymore?
GOD, where were you when my son needed you?"
The Surgeon said, "One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes to let you spend time with your son's remains before it's
transported to the university".
Sally asked that the nurse stay with her while she said Good-bye to her son. Sally ran her fingers through his thick red curly hair. The nurse said, "Would you like a lock of his hair?"
Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of his hair and put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally.
Sally said, "It was Jimmy's idea to give his body to the University for Study. He said it might help somebody else," and that is what he wanted.
I said, No at first, but Jimmy said, "Mom I won't be using it after I die, maybe it will help some other little boy to be able to spend one more day with his mother. My Jimmy had a heart of Gold, always thinking of someone else and always wanting to help others if he could".
Sally walked out of the Children's Hospital for the last time now after spending most of the last 6 months there. She sat the bag with Jimmy's things in it on the seat beside of her in the car. The drive home was hard and it was even harder to go into an empty house. She took the bag to Jimmy's room and started placing the model cars and things back in his room exactly where he always kept them. She laid down across his bed and cried herself to sleep holding his pillow.
Sally woke up about midnight and laying beside of her on the bed, was a letter folded up. She opened the letter, it said:
Dear Mom,
I'll never forget you or stop loving you because I'm not around to
say I LOVE YOU. I'll think of you every day mom and I'll love you
even more each day. Some day we will see each other again. If you
want to adopt a little boy so you won't be so lonely, he can have
my room and my old stuff to play with. If you decide to get a girl
instead, she probably wouldn't like the same things as us boys do,
so you will have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like. Don't be
sad when you think about me, this is really a great place. Grandma
and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around some,
but it will take a long time to see everything here.
The angels are so friendly, I love to watch them fly. Jesus doesn't
look like any of the pictures I saw of Him, but I knew it was Him
as soon as I saw Him. Jesus took me to see GOD! And guess what mom?
I got to sit on GOD'S knee and talk to Him like I was somebody
important. I told GOD that I wanted to write you a letter and tell
you Good-bye and everything, but I knew that wasn't allowed. God
handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter with. I think Gabriel is the name of
the angel that is going to drop this letter off to you. God said
for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked Him
about. Where was He when I needed him?
God said, "The same place He was when Jesus was on the Cross". He
was right there, as He always is with all His children. Oh, by the
way Mom, nobody else can see what is written on this paper but you.
To everyone else, it looks like a blank piece of paper. I have to
give God His pen back now,
He has some more names to write in the Book Of Life. Tonight I get
to sit at the table with Jesus for Supper. I'm sure the food will
be great. I almost forgot to let you know - Now I'm not hurt
anymore, the cancer is all gone. I'm glad because I couldn't stand that pain anymore and
God couldn't stand to see me suffer the pain either, so He sent The
Angel of Mercy to get me.
The Angel said I was Special Delivery! Signed with love from: God
& Jesus & Me.
Take 60 seconds & give this a shot! Let's just see Satan stop this one!
The Surgeon said, "I'm sorry, we did all we could."
Sally said, "Why do little children get cancer, doesn't GOD care anymore?
GOD, where were you when my son needed you?"
The Surgeon said, "One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes to let you spend time with your son's remains before it's
transported to the university".
Sally asked that the nurse stay with her while she said Good-bye to her son. Sally ran her fingers through his thick red curly hair. The nurse said, "Would you like a lock of his hair?"
Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of his hair and put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally.
Sally said, "It was Jimmy's idea to give his body to the University for Study. He said it might help somebody else," and that is what he wanted.
I said, No at first, but Jimmy said, "Mom I won't be using it after I die, maybe it will help some other little boy to be able to spend one more day with his mother. My Jimmy had a heart of Gold, always thinking of someone else and always wanting to help others if he could".
Sally walked out of the Children's Hospital for the last time now after spending most of the last 6 months there. She sat the bag with Jimmy's things in it on the seat beside of her in the car. The drive home was hard and it was even harder to go into an empty house. She took the bag to Jimmy's room and started placing the model cars and things back in his room exactly where he always kept them. She laid down across his bed and cried herself to sleep holding his pillow.
Sally woke up about midnight and laying beside of her on the bed, was a letter folded up. She opened the letter, it said:
Dear Mom,
I'll never forget you or stop loving you because I'm not around to
say I LOVE YOU. I'll think of you every day mom and I'll love you
even more each day. Some day we will see each other again. If you
want to adopt a little boy so you won't be so lonely, he can have
my room and my old stuff to play with. If you decide to get a girl
instead, she probably wouldn't like the same things as us boys do,
so you will have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like. Don't be
sad when you think about me, this is really a great place. Grandma
and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around some,
but it will take a long time to see everything here.
The angels are so friendly, I love to watch them fly. Jesus doesn't
look like any of the pictures I saw of Him, but I knew it was Him
as soon as I saw Him. Jesus took me to see GOD! And guess what mom?
I got to sit on GOD'S knee and talk to Him like I was somebody
important. I told GOD that I wanted to write you a letter and tell
you Good-bye and everything, but I knew that wasn't allowed. God
handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter with. I think Gabriel is the name of
the angel that is going to drop this letter off to you. God said
for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked Him
about. Where was He when I needed him?
God said, "The same place He was when Jesus was on the Cross". He
was right there, as He always is with all His children. Oh, by the
way Mom, nobody else can see what is written on this paper but you.
To everyone else, it looks like a blank piece of paper. I have to
give God His pen back now,
He has some more names to write in the Book Of Life. Tonight I get
to sit at the table with Jesus for Supper. I'm sure the food will
be great. I almost forgot to let you know - Now I'm not hurt
anymore, the cancer is all gone. I'm glad because I couldn't stand that pain anymore and
God couldn't stand to see me suffer the pain either, so He sent The
Angel of Mercy to get me.
The Angel said I was Special Delivery! Signed with love from: God
& Jesus & Me.
Take 60 seconds & give this a shot! Let's just see Satan stop this one!
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
The special you
One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name.
Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.
It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.
That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual.
On Monday she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire class was smiling. "Really?" she heard whispered. "I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!" and, "I didn't know others liked me so much," were most of the comments.
No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose.
The students were happy with themselves and one another.
That group of students moved on. Several years later, one of the students was killed in Vietnam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student.
She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked so handsome, so mature.
The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin. As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her.
"Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. She nodded: "yes."
Then he said: "Mark talked about you a lot!"
After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a luncheon. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher.
"We want to show you something," his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket.
"They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it."
Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times.
The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him.
"Thank you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can see, Mark treasured it."
All of Mark's former class mates started to gather around.
Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, "I still have my list It's in the top drawer of my desk at home."
Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album."
"I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary."
Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. "I carry this with me at all times, " Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: "I think we all saved our lists."
That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried.
She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.
The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be.
So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late... AND ONE WAY TO ACCOMPLISH is to forward this message on. If you do not send it, you will have, once again passed up the wonderful opportunity to do something nice and beautiful.
If you've received this, it is because someone cares for you and it means there is probably at least someone for whom you care.
If you're "too busy" to take those few minutes right now to forward this message on, would this be the VERY first time you didn't do that little thing that would make a difference in your relationships?
The more people that you send this to, the better you'll be at reaching out to those you care about.
Remember, you reap what you sow, what you put into the lives of others comes back into your own.
MAY YOUR DAY BE AS SPECIAL AS YOU ARE.
Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.
It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.
That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual.
On Monday she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire class was smiling. "Really?" she heard whispered. "I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!" and, "I didn't know others liked me so much," were most of the comments.
No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose.
The students were happy with themselves and one another.
That group of students moved on. Several years later, one of the students was killed in Vietnam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student.
She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked so handsome, so mature.
The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin. As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her.
"Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. She nodded: "yes."
Then he said: "Mark talked about you a lot!"
After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a luncheon. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher.
"We want to show you something," his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket.
"They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it."
Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times.
The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him.
"Thank you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can see, Mark treasured it."
All of Mark's former class mates started to gather around.
Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, "I still have my list It's in the top drawer of my desk at home."
Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album."
"I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary."
Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. "I carry this with me at all times, " Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: "I think we all saved our lists."
That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried.
She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.
The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be.
So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late... AND ONE WAY TO ACCOMPLISH is to forward this message on. If you do not send it, you will have, once again passed up the wonderful opportunity to do something nice and beautiful.
If you've received this, it is because someone cares for you and it means there is probably at least someone for whom you care.
If you're "too busy" to take those few minutes right now to forward this message on, would this be the VERY first time you didn't do that little thing that would make a difference in your relationships?
The more people that you send this to, the better you'll be at reaching out to those you care about.
Remember, you reap what you sow, what you put into the lives of others comes back into your own.
MAY YOUR DAY BE AS SPECIAL AS YOU ARE.
How will you live your life?
Someone shared this story with me. It touched me. I hope it touches you too.
A very good carpenter felt he was getting old. He told his boss of his plans to leave.
The boss was very sorry to see him go. He asked the carpenter if he could build just one more house as a personal favour.
The carpenter said yes. But after some time it was easy to see that he was not trying his best. His workmanship was not good. He used poor materials. It was sad.
The boss came to look at the house when the carpenter finished it. He then gave the carpenter the key to the front-door.
"This is your house", he said, "my gift to you for so many years of good work."
What a shock! What a shame! If only yhe carpenter had known he was building his own house, he would have done his job differently. Now he has to live in the home he had not built properly.
There is a lesson in this for all of us.
How are we building our lives?
Are we simply following orders or are we doing a good job because we believe any job we do is worth doing well?
Are we satisfied when we put in less than our best?
Or are we among those who, at important points, do not give the job their best effort.
Then, with a shock, they look at what has happened and find that they are now living in the house they had built. If they realise it, I am sure they would have done things differently.
Think of yourself as the carpenter. Think about your house. Each day you hammer a nail, lay a carpet or build a wall.
Build wisely. It is the only life you will ever build. Even if you live it for only one day more, that day deserves to be lived with pride and dignity.
Your life today is the result of your attitudes and choices in the past.
Your life tomorrow will be the result of your attitudes and the choices you make today.
A very good carpenter felt he was getting old. He told his boss of his plans to leave.
The boss was very sorry to see him go. He asked the carpenter if he could build just one more house as a personal favour.
The carpenter said yes. But after some time it was easy to see that he was not trying his best. His workmanship was not good. He used poor materials. It was sad.
The boss came to look at the house when the carpenter finished it. He then gave the carpenter the key to the front-door.
"This is your house", he said, "my gift to you for so many years of good work."
What a shock! What a shame! If only yhe carpenter had known he was building his own house, he would have done his job differently. Now he has to live in the home he had not built properly.
There is a lesson in this for all of us.
How are we building our lives?
Are we simply following orders or are we doing a good job because we believe any job we do is worth doing well?
Are we satisfied when we put in less than our best?
Or are we among those who, at important points, do not give the job their best effort.
Then, with a shock, they look at what has happened and find that they are now living in the house they had built. If they realise it, I am sure they would have done things differently.
Think of yourself as the carpenter. Think about your house. Each day you hammer a nail, lay a carpet or build a wall.
Build wisely. It is the only life you will ever build. Even if you live it for only one day more, that day deserves to be lived with pride and dignity.
Your life today is the result of your attitudes and choices in the past.
Your life tomorrow will be the result of your attitudes and the choices you make today.
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